How to Embarrass Yourself at a Work Dinner

I spent a few days in Chicago this week, and it was bitterly cold. Not that Cleveland hasn't been this winter, but still, something about CHI town this week just felt especially bone-chilling. And there was so much static electricity on the sheets when I pulled down the covers of the hotel bed that I didn't want to get in. Like, at all. An absolute death trap. Then in the morning when I did my hair, it would not settle. The static was practically luminescent.

So, like an idiot, over a work dinner that evening I asked aloud whether there was any science to this whole notion of bitter cold yielding such ungodly static levels. Apparently there totally is. And it's probably something I should have learned about in the second grade. But, you know, whatever. Glad I could present myself as such a competent professional. Hopefully next time I return to the windy city it will be summer.