The Definition of Aging

I'm pretty sure it's the first time your dentist has cause to use the word "crown." For me, it happened this week. And my world fell to pieces. Just as my teeth will surely begin falling out in perfectly-spaced succession from here on out. I mean, honestly, do I really want to live in a world where I'm being advised against chewing almonds on the right side of my mouth?

Bring on the applesauce and jello.